HomeRandomly Stupid Chuck Norris Jokes Fanclub
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Randomly Stupid Chuck Norris Jokes Fanclub
by Guest Thu Mar 04, 2010 12:59 pm
xD join if you love chuck norris jokes!
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Re: Randomly Stupid Chuck Norris Jokes Fanclub
by Alaric Thu Mar 04, 2010 4:16 pm
I think their weird, but my friend Ben's really into them XD
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Re: Randomly Stupid Chuck Norris Jokes Fanclub
by Guest Thu Mar 04, 2010 9:47 pm
xD they are weird, but most of them are so stupid that its hilarious! xD
Chuck Norris has the manliest children in the world. And they're all girls.
Chuck Norris has the manliest children in the world. And they're all girls.
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Re: Randomly Stupid Chuck Norris Jokes Fanclub
by Alaric Fri Mar 05, 2010 7:14 am
XD You sound just like Ben, lol
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Re: Randomly Stupid Chuck Norris Jokes Fanclub
by Guest Fri Mar 05, 2010 7:20 am
lmao I love you Dark! Chuck Norris is amazing! XD
Most people cut their grass, Chuck Norris just looks at his and dares it to grow
Chuck Norris doesn't have a chin, he only has a third fist
The term break a leg was used by Chuck Norris' co-stars to wish good luck..
indicating that a broken leg might be the least of their injuries
And the one I still love
Jesus walked on water, but Chuck Norris can swim through land
Most people cut their grass, Chuck Norris just looks at his and dares it to grow
Chuck Norris doesn't have a chin, he only has a third fist
The term break a leg was used by Chuck Norris' co-stars to wish good luck..
indicating that a broken leg might be the least of their injuries
And the one I still love
Jesus walked on water, but Chuck Norris can swim through land
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Re: Randomly Stupid Chuck Norris Jokes Fanclub
by Guest Fri Mar 05, 2010 8:24 am
Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer.
Too bad he's never cried.
Ever.
Too bad he's never cried.
Ever.
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Re: Randomly Stupid Chuck Norris Jokes Fanclub
by Guest Fri Mar 05, 2010 10:17 am
The only thing he can't do is break his limits. That's because he has no limits to break. But he does it anyways just to prove that he could if it was possible.
The only thing he can't stand up against is an army of Gandalf the grey, and gandalf the white, monty python and the holy grail's black knight, benito musilini, and the blue meanie, and cowboy curtis, and jombi the genie, robocop and terminator, captain kirk and darth vader, lo-pan, superman, every single power ranger, Bill S. Preston and Theodore Logan, spock, the rock, doc ock, and hulk hogan. That's because he can take them all while sitting down.
Chuck Norris read a list of the saddest events in history AND experienced all of them and didn't cry. But the sadness in his heart created Hurricane Katrina as well as melting the polar ice caps.
Win is made of Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris caused the great crash by staring at his computer screen.
Chuck Norris can say Candle Jack's name without Candle Jack kidnapping him. He breaks the laws of space and time to make Candle Jack's face appear under his foot whenever he says Candle Jack. In fact, when Candle Jack says Chuck Norris's name, Chuck Norris kidnaps him.
There are no Mary Sues. Only Chuck Norris wannabes.
Cthullu is Chuck Norris's punching bag.
Chuck Norris does
not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck
Norris goes killing.
Chuck Norris counted
to infinity - twice.
Chuck Norris sold
his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial
arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse
kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates
irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They
now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
When the Boogeyman
goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris built
a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As
Oswald shot, Chuck Norris met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting
them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.
Chuck Norris has
already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
They once made
a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
A blind man once
stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who
I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this
man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw,
was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.
In fine print
on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all
world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are
simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.
The Great Wall
of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed misserably.
Crop circles are
Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie
the fuck down.
thats all for now folks! xD more later
The only thing he can't stand up against is an army of Gandalf the grey, and gandalf the white, monty python and the holy grail's black knight, benito musilini, and the blue meanie, and cowboy curtis, and jombi the genie, robocop and terminator, captain kirk and darth vader, lo-pan, superman, every single power ranger, Bill S. Preston and Theodore Logan, spock, the rock, doc ock, and hulk hogan. That's because he can take them all while sitting down.
Chuck Norris read a list of the saddest events in history AND experienced all of them and didn't cry. But the sadness in his heart created Hurricane Katrina as well as melting the polar ice caps.
Win is made of Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris caused the great crash by staring at his computer screen.
Chuck Norris can say Candle Jack's name without Candle Jack kidnapping him. He breaks the laws of space and time to make Candle Jack's face appear under his foot whenever he says Candle Jack. In fact, when Candle Jack says Chuck Norris's name, Chuck Norris kidnaps him.
There are no Mary Sues. Only Chuck Norris wannabes.
Cthullu is Chuck Norris's punching bag.
Chuck Norris does
not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck
Norris goes killing.
Chuck Norris counted
to infinity - twice.
Chuck Norris sold
his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial
arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse
kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates
irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They
now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
When the Boogeyman
goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris built
a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As
Oswald shot, Chuck Norris met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting
them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.
Chuck Norris has
already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
They once made
a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
A blind man once
stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who
I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this
man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw,
was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.
In fine print
on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all
world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are
simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.
The Great Wall
of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed misserably.
Crop circles are
Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie
the fuck down.
thats all for now folks! xD more later
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Re: Randomly Stupid Chuck Norris Jokes Fanclub
by Guest Sat Mar 06, 2010 9:01 am
Chuck Norris once
ate an entire ream of rice paper and sh*t out origami swans and Mister
Miyagi from Karate Kid.
Chuck Norris put
humpty dumpty back together again, only to roundhouse kick him in the
face. Later Chuck dined on scrambled eggs with all the king's horses and
all the king's men. The king himself could not attend for unspecified
reasons. Coincidentally, the autopsoy revealed the cause of death to be
a roundhouse kick to the face. There is only one King.
When Chuck Norris
played golf for money, chuck marked down a hole in 0 every time, a pro
at the golf club, said to Chuck: "excuse me sir, but you cant score
zero on a hole". Chuck Norris turned towards the man and said, im
Chuck Norris, the man then proceeded to pour gas over his body and set
himself on fire because that would be less painful than getting roundhouse
kicked by Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him in the face
anyways.
Chuck Norris made Ellen Degeneres straight.
China was once
bordering the United States, until Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked it all
the way through the Earth.
If you have five
dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money
than you.
When Chuck Norris
had surgery, the anesthesia was applied to the doctors.
Multiple people
have died from Chuck Norris giving them the finger.
If Chuck Norris
is late, time better slow the f*ck down
Chuck Norris sleeps
with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but
the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris can
touch MC Hammer.
Chuck Norris ordered
a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
There is no such
thing as tornadoes. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.
Chuck Norris doesn't
worry about changing his clock twice a year for daylight savings time.
The sun rises and sets when Chuck tells it to.
If paper beats
rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, what beats all 3
at the same time? Answer: Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris
was denied a Bacon McMuffin at McDonalds because it was 10:35, he roundhouse
kicked the store so hard it became a KFC.
Chuck Norris’
roundhouse kick is so powerful, it can be seen from outer space by the
naked eye.
Chuck Norris doesn’t
believe in Germany. (O.o)
Chuck Norris eats
transformer toys in vehicle mode and poos them out transformed into a
robot.
Chuck Norris owns
the greatest poker face of all-time. It helped him win the 1983 world
series of poker despite him holding just a joker, a 2 of clubs, a 7 of
spades, and a green number 4 from Uno and a monopoly ‘get out of
jail free’ card.
ate an entire ream of rice paper and sh*t out origami swans and Mister
Miyagi from Karate Kid.
Chuck Norris put
humpty dumpty back together again, only to roundhouse kick him in the
face. Later Chuck dined on scrambled eggs with all the king's horses and
all the king's men. The king himself could not attend for unspecified
reasons. Coincidentally, the autopsoy revealed the cause of death to be
a roundhouse kick to the face. There is only one King.
When Chuck Norris
played golf for money, chuck marked down a hole in 0 every time, a pro
at the golf club, said to Chuck: "excuse me sir, but you cant score
zero on a hole". Chuck Norris turned towards the man and said, im
Chuck Norris, the man then proceeded to pour gas over his body and set
himself on fire because that would be less painful than getting roundhouse
kicked by Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him in the face
anyways.
Chuck Norris made Ellen Degeneres straight.
China was once
bordering the United States, until Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked it all
the way through the Earth.
If you have five
dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money
than you.
When Chuck Norris
had surgery, the anesthesia was applied to the doctors.
Multiple people
have died from Chuck Norris giving them the finger.
If Chuck Norris
is late, time better slow the f*ck down
Chuck Norris sleeps
with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but
the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris can
touch MC Hammer.
Chuck Norris ordered
a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
There is no such
thing as tornadoes. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.
Chuck Norris doesn't
worry about changing his clock twice a year for daylight savings time.
The sun rises and sets when Chuck tells it to.
If paper beats
rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, what beats all 3
at the same time? Answer: Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris
was denied a Bacon McMuffin at McDonalds because it was 10:35, he roundhouse
kicked the store so hard it became a KFC.
Chuck Norris’
roundhouse kick is so powerful, it can be seen from outer space by the
naked eye.
Chuck Norris doesn’t
believe in Germany. (O.o)
Chuck Norris eats
transformer toys in vehicle mode and poos them out transformed into a
robot.
Chuck Norris owns
the greatest poker face of all-time. It helped him win the 1983 world
series of poker despite him holding just a joker, a 2 of clubs, a 7 of
spades, and a green number 4 from Uno and a monopoly ‘get out of
jail free’ card.
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Re: Randomly Stupid Chuck Norris Jokes Fanclub
by Alaric Sat Mar 06, 2010 3:58 pm
that last one was funny XD
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