Over the river and through the woods

Tobi shrugged. "Oh, come on, Al. A super-duper gal like you doesn't have to worry about that."

It all happened so fast, but to be blunt, I don't think Tobi will be having kids any time soon... in other words Al used his height to his advantage and kicked the man -very hard- in the balls.

Tobi groaned and fell to his knees. "Not...cool," He said with a cough.

"You're right, it isn't cool... It's funny." The boy said with a snicker

Tobi made coughed. "I...hate you...Al. I...really...do," He wheezed.

"Aw, really?" Al asked as he shifted into Kiri Hawkeye and smile sincerily, before speaking in her voice as well, "Really, really?"

Tobi groaned again. "Stop trying to avoid it," He said, "Feel the hate, Toeblade."

The boy shifted back to normal and pouted.
"How can you hate me? I'm innocent." He said in a cute face, "And i have an ice-bag."
And true to his word, a bag of ice materialized in his hand, to tease Tobi into admitting he didn't hate Al.

Tobi groaned louder. "Innocent my ass. Give me the damn bag!" Of course, in his pain, all rationality failed him. He could have easily made his own ice using the moisture in the air, being the Whiteice alchemist.

"Say you don't hate me and you get all of the ice-bags you want -they're small enough for me to materialize without hassle-."

Tobi gave Al the most terrible death glare he could manage in his pain. "Alexander," He said slowly, "I am going to murder you."

"How are you going to do that?" Al asked in a sweet, teasing voice as he held the bag just out of Tobi's reach.

Tobi's eyes narrowed. "Goddammit, Al, I will step on your short girly ass! Now give me the damn ice or I swear..." He decided to let Al finish the threat.

"Fuck. See, I swore for you~~" The boy said with a giggle in his voice.

Tobi fumed in fury. "I. Am. Going. To. Murder. You," He said, breaking it down. As soon as I can stand again, that is.

Al began to snicker at the look on Tobi's face, before jumping back a tinge and waving the ice-bag in front of Tobi's face.
"You can't murder me~~~"

Tobi made a lunge for the bag, but missed, only succeeding in falling from his knees to his face. "I can and will," He said, voice muffled by the ground.

Now Al began to crack up into laughter as he dropped the bag onto the back of the man's head, the ice in it already half-melted.
"Sure, and I'm the muffin man!!"

Grumbling under his breath, Tobi sat up and grabbed the ice from off his head. Transmuting it so that it was entirely frozen again, he put it on in between his legs.

Al couldn't help but snicker. Tobi looked so pathetic right now...

Tobi gave Al another death glare. "I can only assume you have no idea what this feels like, considering you are, and always will be, a girl, eh Wonderbra?"

"Wonderbra?!?!" Al screached, "How the hell did you come up with that one!?"

Tobi wrinkled his forehead "I'm imaginative and intelligent,"

"Ergo stupid."

Tobi sighed. "I am literally going to murder you now, Al. At least twice."